Archive for September, 2012

The Speech.

Posted: September 8, 2012 in Itu Andy

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. Truth be told, I never graduated from college and this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why I dropped out? It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking “We have an unexpected baby boy, do you want him?” They said “Of course”. My biological mother found out later that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would go to college. This was the start in my life.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked far more interesting.

It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example.

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it’s likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well worn path and that will make all the difference.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down – that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking and don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking, don’t settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right. “It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and thankfully I’m fine now.

This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope it’s the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept.

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960’s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along. It was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

Thank you all very much.





Dream BIG.

Posted: September 8, 2012 in Itu Andy

Andy’s Lamborghini

A friend once told me “If you wanna go, GO BIG Andy”. He told me when I was standing at The Puteri Pan Pacific Hotel Johor Bahru staircase thinking what will happen if I did backside 50-50 on the handrail and failed. It was in 1996 when I was in Form 3.

I stood there for around half an hour thinking the negative possibilities that might happen to me IF I failed. What IF I fell and broke my ankle? Or one of my knees? Or one of my arms? How am I gonna tell my mom and my dad about it? How I wanna go to school and study? If I can’t go to school, how can I be a brilliant, superb and successful person one day?

SUCCESSFUL Backside 50-50

Ok, that school part, I’m just bluffing. Actually I never thought about it at all. I’m just giving a good example for dak-dak skola yang baca artikel ni especially to Zani bhahahahaha! I didn’t do much study during my time because God have created a lot of marvelous, brilliant brains and He installed one of it inside my head. For that, I would like to say “Thank you God!”

So, back to the story. Zam “The Bapak” Korekara and Kadok told me “Just GO Andy” after Man Pro did backside board slide at the tip of the handrail. Board slide cuit-cuit nama trick die. Shoot, I still remember that! Hahahahaha. I swung my board down to the pavement, kayuh, then I popped-off the ground, landed on the handrail, locking the truck, grind it for a sec, felt the adrenalin rush and do you know what happened? I fell and I FAILED!

FAILED Backside 50-50

Miraculously, nothing happened and I’m not injured at all. I rose up, took my board, tried again for the second time and I failed. I did the same thing for the third time and the result were same. That time I hurt my knee and elbow but I keep on trying. Before I continue my forth attempt, I sat on my board, breathing slowly and did some defragmentation for my mind. At that point of time, I was thinking “Push Atau Mati”. Meaning, I have to try it one more time and create a history of my life or I just continue sitting on my board, go back home and sleep. No interesting things will happen, I will sleep with full of regret and unpeaceful mind. For the forth attempt, I have landed backside 50-50 on the Puteri Pan Pacific Hotel Johor Bahru handrail at the age of 15 in 1996. I created a history for myself. The feeling? It was so freaking awesome!

16 years later, I am facing the most difficult time of my life. The time that feelings are fragile, things can get very sensitive and support is needed most. At this point of time, I finally realized and aware who my true friends are. Not all will be there for you, not all will understand your situation, lend a helping hand and support you. But, it is OK. Everything is going to be fine Andy.

During this crucial time, that handrail story came flashing back in my mind. What I did, I keep on moving forward, never stop trying and BELIEVE. I failed to grind on the handrail 3 times but I managed to do it on the forth trials. My life changed. People were starting to respect and praised me. Word spread from mouth-to-mouth and I became popular for quite some times. The point is not about the fame but it is about how I get up and face my failure. I passed the test.

Now, I am talking to myself by typing this article reminding myself not to give up. I have to remember that these are the higher level test for me to pass so I can be at another level higher. I also have to bear in my mind that at the age of 31, not many people are brave enough to take the challenges that I am facing. Most of them will choose a moderate type of life which less risks because they are afraid it will affect their financial situation yet they want to be successful. There are no such thing for you to be rich without doing something “crazy” and extraordinary. You always tell other people that you wanna do a business but what type of business that you wanna do? Are you doing something different from what you are doing usually? Are you doing something that leads you to your dream “business”? Ask yourself, look at the mirror and answer. If you are not doing anything that leads to your “business”, stop dreaming to be rich. There is no such thing as an easy way to success. Remember the investment theory; High risk, High return.

Currently, I am in the midst of setting up a business that relates to logistic. It is something new for me. I have faith in it. I REALLY BELIEVE that I WILL SUCCESS in this business. I have people who back me up and put their trust in me. I don’t care what people are talking about my down-turn, I really don’t. Reason because I am strong and stubborn in good ways. I really don’t mind if people laugh and look down at me because I know I am better from them. I am creating another history of my life but they are not doing anything to improve themselves. Pity them. One thing I would like to remind these type of people is “If you were absent during my struggles, don’t expect to be present during my success” and I REALLY MEAN IT!

To An Nabilah, no one is standing behind me and supporting me during my most difficult and crucial time in my life except you. I know that things are messy at this moment but bare with me my love, the time shall come. I am still fighting this battle and I am not done yet. Whatever you do, DON’T STOP, JUST DO IT and BELIEVE. IT WILL DEFINITELY COME TO YOU!

To my uncle Pak Busu, no words I can spare nor to describe how thankful I am to have you in my life. You are very supportive, understanding and open-minded uncle ever!

To Derk, you are more than a friend, more than a family. You never stop supporting me during thick and thin no matter what happen. My promise to you, I will take a good care of your family. No words can describe how grateful and thankful I am to you my brother.

To Haji Khairul Nizam, I will do my very best to make our business success. I am very thankful to you and your family for giving me this opportunity and your trust in me. I shall not forget all of you.

To Najmie, you are a man of your words. I met few people seeking for help but none return. But when I called to meet you, you just said “YES” without a second thought. You promised me that you’ll get back to me in two weeks time, you did it within the period. I am truly amazed and grateful to have a good friend like you. Billion thanks to you brother.

To Famo and Ann, you guys are very supportive leaders. With your endless support, thank you for never fail believing in me. I received a warm and welcome treatment every time I turned to you guys. Tak pernah fail! Gazillion thanks Famo and Ann!

To Mambang, Kamarul, Ejan and Zaidi, I guess you guys know me well. Give me ample time to straighten things up.

What Steve Jobs said is true. “Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later. You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well worn path; and that will make all the difference.”